Being a Woman

Let me tell you first and foremost, being a woman ain’t easy...



We know what we want (at least 60% of the times), and we’re equally sure who we want it from. So, if I’m sad and I want Mr. X to come and give me solace, it won’t matter if Mr. W, Y and Z come and put their arms around me and buy me a million gifts and shower me with love, support and care. I am STILL going to miss Mr. X and his consolation. Of course, I am going to appreciate the others, and thank them for their help, but Mr. X, thou art doomed!!


Come to think of it, WHY do guys need to be told what to do? Just like we gauge their needs and understand their desires without them voicing it out loud, why can’t they also do the same? I mean, it wouldn’t hurt to try! There have been a lot of times when the guy himself did not know what he was confused or stressed about, and a girl eased his mind by being sympathetic and kind. We’re all humans, we all have the same range of feelings, and it’s really not that tough if we make an effort to comprehend and assist.


Most women I know would agree that telling/asking for something to be said/done is not quite the same as the thing being said/done instinctively and voluntarily. What’s the use you loving me if you do not grasp the fact that there are times when I just need to be heard and hugged without being shown a hundred ways that are better. I am aware of what I have to do and how, just be calm and empathic, you moron! That’s all I need from you!!

Guys around the world know they’re kids. They either stumble upon this realization by themselves, or they read it in the zillions of magazines and books that talk about gender differences and peculiarities of the sexes. So, whether they agree or not, they very well know that their primary needs are food, sex and sleep. And so do we. And we take care to see that their needs are met. Be it the mum who keeps snacks ready the moment the son comes home from college, or the wife who entertains the man by night despite being dog tired at work all day, or the girlfriend who doesn’t call her sleeping boyfriend for a few hours even though she wants to talk to him desperately.


Why then is it soooo difficult for the men to appreciate us? Why is it impossible for them to anticipate our wants and fulfill them? Why do they find us complicated when all we need is a listening ear and a warm shoulder? How can they expect their stupid jokes to make us laugh when our hearts are weighed down by some misery that we are unsure and unable to express without being asked? You maybe close to me, and you may not require a prologue to talk about your concerns, but I do. And what’s wrong with that?


Let me admit, I expect people who are close to me to know me and the things that please me or tick me off. So, anyone in their right sense of mind wouldn’t ditch me after planning to meet, and anyone who has faced the music after they did something unpleasant wouldn’t do it again. Yet, I want my loved one(s) to know when I’m upset or when something has hurt me. It could be something as small as not messaging me before you sleep, or not telling me when you’re ill or suffering other crises. It could be when you keep repeating the same mistake again and again despite knowing it irritates me. Or that you give others priority over me, when I’m the one whose always there when you’re in trouble. Get what I mean?


So yeah, I have those sort of conditions with people I like and love. I CANNOT love unconditionally. Nope, I cannot. I can’t be ok with every way you treat me and any way you behave with me. If I’m being civil and nice, it’s your obligation to be the same to me. And if that’s something that’s not within your control, then goodbye. And let that goodbye be forever. Not the “here now and gone then” types. The wound needs to heal so that someone else can come and give me the happiness that is not in your power to grant your sweetheart.


Movies like What Women Want are made and watched the world over. And yet men don’t understand that all we need is love. We’re ready to help you in understanding us, just show us that you are devoted and dedicated and (willingly) ready to make that effort. We know people don’t learn things in the womb, but we surely want folks to learn things that would endear them to us. Ask us what we want, if you’re unable to understand. But not before you have tried every other option.


Besides, we're such sentimental fools that we'll never tell you directly what we are thinking. I'm sure you've heard of this one - when we say "we're fine OR it's ok", it means "nothing is fine." And when we say, "just leave me alone OR go away", it indicates that "please don't go, just stay and show me you care." And when someone you know who needs you says "I hate you", it actually stands for "I love you helluva lot, but you hurt me too much".


You see, we want to show we're independent. Yet the fact remains that even the most practical women are emotional at heart. And there's no denying that. We often don't NEED you, but we WANT to be showed that we're loved and cherished.


Awrite so we crib and complain and nag, at times more regularly than sunrise and sunset... and what do you do? Start ignoring us! And how does that help? It only makes us more crabby and depressed. And the vicious cycle continues... Why not try something more constructive and positive?


Our needs are not as simple as sex, nor as tough as a Sudoku puzzle. Sometimes an ice cream can do the trick, at other times, you may have to be a little more tolerant and listen to us as we rant on and on about the boss who yelled at us, or the friend who lost her cat, or the junior who can’t make a decision and needs our advice. You may have to make us feel better by a foot massage or by praising us non-stop for 50 minutes…


Different things work for different people, and for women, the one common need is to be pampered and treated like a child. We’re all little girls within, and if you remember that, you can never go wrong…


Do one tiny thing at the right time to make us smile, and I promise, no woman on earth will disappoint you or turn you away when you seek shelter, estranged by the callous world.

Sincerely,
Barnita

P.S. : Nope, I’ve not fought with or been hurt by any guy. These are some things I’ve always wanted to say (and might have, before, either on my blog or in person). Just thought I’d put them up here for all you guys to read and learn, and for all you girls to share and rejoice about :-) Take care!!

Thank You to You!!

Apparently January 11 is International Thank You Day.

And I know I am late.

Here is my Thank You to you :-)

Vote of thanks was never quite my favorite part of any meeting or conference. One, coz it’s predictable and boring. Two, coz more often than not, I was expected to deliver it. Often at a minute’s notice. Grrr…

But hey, I gotta say it here.

Thank you, ladies and gentlemen!!

“Freebird” is now 17 followers strong, and has 1525+ clicks till date. For a personal blog roughly 4 months old and 28 posts thick, I think it’s a great achievement. For me, and for you…

For staying loyal and interested throughout the times I’ve written about the same old topics, for coming back and checking despite there being no updates, for passing on the word and popularizing my blog… I remain grateful to you all. A million thanks!

I’ve been blog-rolled by many, and quite a few of you have added your name to my followers list. It’s always a pleasure reading the comments you make about the topics and writing style, irrespective of whether you consent or criticize. A vast chunk of you still prefer to be nameless and tiptoe in and out, leaving your footprints on my reader tracker. To all of you, I am indebted.

At times it gets a little scary and burdensome, knowing that there are so many of you out there, reading what I write and passing judgments about me based on what you interpret from my writing.

It freaks me out sometimes that there are people that I personally know and do not know who have more than adequate knowledge about me, my life, my thoughts and attitude.

I won’t deny that I’ve occasionally censored my words and evaluations because I know someone might get offended or shocked by me and my confessions.

And then I wonder whether I really wanted my blog to be this well-known. What started out as a personal diary online, has now become sort of a commercial magazine. And the difficult part is, I don’t know who’s reading it and who’s not!

Not that I mind really. Being a Pisces, seeking attention and reveling in it is an innate trait. Yet, I sometimes want to tone down my description or emotion, just to ensure someone does not fret or lose sleep.

Any time a stranger, colleague or friend tells me that he/she has been reading my blog, I feel a little surprised as if I don’t know what he/she is talking about. I feel pleased that he/she would take the time out to read what I’ve written, and that he/she would care two-pence about my values and experiences. It feels great. And I mean it for every one of you. I honestly do. If you’ve been reading my blog long enough, you know I don’t mince words or tell lies. Thank you once again. It really means a lot to me.

Even if I don’t know who you are, where you’re from. As long as you love me and my blog.

I do apologize for the times and words that have made you feel bad or misjudged. Trust me, the intention was not to hurt any one of you, but to share my perceptions and emotions. If I’ve ever mentioned you in my blog – directly or indirectly – it was because I felt something for you or the incident, not coz I want to ridicule you or tout my brilliance. Of course, confidentiality is vital, and I would never compromise on your faith in me or make you the butt of humiliation by sharing your true identity.

I’m running outta words here… Extraordinary, isn’t it?!! But really. I don’t know what more to say to express my gratitude.

Just a warm thank you and a bear hug to all if you.

Each one of you.

Keep reading.

This blog would be nowhere without your love and appreciation.


I thankfully remain,
Barnita :)

And life goes on...

I cry myself to sleep this night
I don’t know what I’m waiting for,
Seeking peace and a little joy
Neither jewels and luxuries nor.

This day is not the same as I wearily tread,
Till dusk from dawn,
The days of adventure and reckless abandon,
Are so long gone.

Had I been a tad more desperate,
I’d surrender myself to God
I’d have given up on my existence,
No matter if it’s craven or odd...

I know no one’s content,
That nobody leads a life ideal,
But somehow being in my shoes,
The agony is much real.

I appear to have lost all hope,
As wrongdoers bask in fun and bliss,
Things that bother me no end,
Civilization seems to allow this!

As I rant on and crib,
I feel so absurd and frivolous,
I live through days dreary,
And sob through nights delirious.

Don’t get me wrong,
I ain’t complaining;
I’m sharing life with you
And for action or contentment, waiting...

When You Know…

They were the best of friends and lovers. Both of them knew each other inside out. However, she being a girl was extremely sensitive to the smallest of issues and he being the guy could never quite figure out why she got so worked up about seemingly trivial stuff. Fights were plentiful, but they always got back with each other knowing fully well that they could not bear to be apart. There were many times when he went out of his way and nature to accommodate her needs and wishes, and she tried her best to be as calm and flexible as he desired. Time passed, and they went from being buddies to being soul-mates.

A few months ago, she would not have been quite so tolerant. Time and tide can make the hardest of us malleable and patient. Even he, known for being a truant and miscreant at the most opportune moments, had surprised folks who knew him, by being sensitive and determined. They both needed to make this work. And it showed.

It showed when he spoke to her. It showed when he looked at her, a wide naughty grin plastered on his face. It showed when she saw him, often as he returned the gaze. It showed when they walked hand in hand and did not say a word. It showed when they spoke about things informational, emotional and critical. It showed when she spoke about him to others in the family and friend circle. It showed when he held her and refused to let go. It showed when she did the wackiest of things just to make him smile. It showed in a million ways.

First love? No, not for either of them. Love at first sight? Not for her, at least.

She often thought of why and how she had managed to like him in the first place, forget accepting him in her life as a deserving and able partner. He was not perfect in any way and she knew that she wouldn’t recommend him to any other girl for sure. He had done the craziest of things and he had an opinion about everything, frequently based on nothing but stubbornness. What, then, had moved her to believe that it was this guy she wanted to spend her life with? She knew for a fact that there would be tough times ahead. But did that deter her from saying “I do”? She didn’t think so.

After all, she thought she wasn’t as beautiful as his previous girlfriends. She also knew her temper was tough to tackle, and his love for her was true. (How did she know that? She just KNEW.) She knew she felt special and safe with him, and he was trying to be what she wanted him to be. She knew it would take time, and she was willing to give him his fair chance. Why? THAT she didn’t know...

He, too, had his own misgivings about whether things were going the way they ought to be going. Were they really meant to be? Was there being together a mistake or chance? Was their life going to be disastrous once they took their vows? He had so many dreams - what would happen to them once she became a part of his life? Was she really what she showed, or was it all a façade? … Somehow he thought he knew the answers, but that did not relieve the anxiety or resolve the issue.


Yet, he knew that what he felt for her, he had never felt before. Of the many girls who had been with him, he knew that it was she he would miss if things didn’t work out this time. She challenged and annoyed him in myriad ways, but he only loved her all the more for it. The same confidence about her that had attracted him to her also became a pain in the wrong place when she turned against him for some reason (that he thought was mostly silly and unreasonable). And yet… he knew that together they would be ok.

Neither of them wanted it any other way.

Are soul-mates supposed to be perfect for each other? Are they supposed to fill each other’s gaps or are they supposed to fit together in the same mould? Do opposites attract or do birds of a feather flock together? Some answers are not easy, nor are some decisions.

You just have to KNOW what you want… and what you can’t do without…

What would you regret not having in your life… and what would you miss till your last breath…

And once you think about it… you just KNOW…

Do you?

(Note: This is not the story of Marshal and Lily!)

Such is life...

A phonebook and cell memory full of contacts,
But no one to call when you desperately want to speak your heart out.
Such is life...

A million bucks to spend, and no friend to blow it with,
When you had that someone, you were too busy trying to make an extra buck.
Such is life...

At times I think homosexual relations make sense,
The depth of emotions of each gender can only b understood by another of the same kind.
We fight over our differences and keep expecting to be understood.
Such is life…

The very son who dotes on the mother,
Becomes devoted to the wife in days so few.
The mom still prays for him.
Such is life…

You crib about the bad things,
And then you adjust to living in situations worse.
Your optimism and energy disappear with time.
Such is life…

When everything is wrong the smallest thing brings delight,
Something that goes unnoticed in rosier times,
Becomes the single reason to live for.
Such is life…

Good things don’t really happen to good people,
Though we would sure like to believe so.
The wicked and wayward laugh more often.
Such is life…

You smile for the world,
And show you really don’t care.
But you nurture the hurts within you…
This is life...

Happy New Year :)

A rose by any other name…

He loved her.

He loved her not.




He loved her.

He loved her not.




He loved her.

He loved her not.




The petals of the pink rose were quickly diminishing.




Was it a wise idea to gauge the authenticity of his feelings by trusting the number of petals in a flower?




What if one had dropped by itself before he had handed it to her?




Too bad. That’s a chance she would have to take.




He loved her.

He loved her not.




Tweet Tweet… Tweet Tweet SMS…




Blank message.




He said blank messages meant he was thinking of her and missed her.



Of that she had no doubt.

She knew she made a difference to his life.



As had he.




But love?

Now that was a little dubious.



And if she be permitted, scary.




Love hurt, and she’d learnt her lesson not so long ago.




He loved her.

He loved her not.




Tring Tring…




“Hey babes, what you doing?”

“Nothing much. What you up to?”

“I’m missing you. Just thought you should know.”




He loved her.



And she didn’t need rose petals to prove that.

Ordained By Order

Did I tell you I saw Eat, Pray and Love (referred to as EPL henceforth on my blog) directed by Ryan Murphy ? It’s a fantastic movie, guys. I mean girls.

(Guys may or may not like it for the simple reason that the genders think, feel and expect differently. And more often than not, the sexes just LOVE being on opposite sides of the discussion. Sometimes only to prove that they are unlike each other, and can never be like each other. Fair enough reason.)

(Or so I presume.)


While watching EPL, there were so many times when I thought it was somewhere related to Me! Especially the paragraphs when the protagonist feels she has control issues, her tryst with depression and loneliness, her random insights and careless abandon, little joys coupled with frustrating worries and sorrows. Have been thinking of it for ages, but procrastinating… Waiting for a partner, dealing with a busy schedule, stuff like that… Soon soon…


What’s the movie about? It’s the story of a woman who travels Italy, India and Indonesia over the period of a year in order to put back the pieces of her life married and scarred by a divorce and broken relationship. I know it doesn’t sound too innovative, but the narration is superb and mesmerizing.


I’m not gonna recommend it to you, though, coz I have a feeling that I have liked it more than you would. It’s like those movies, you know, where your evaluation of the entertainment quotient is impacted by the reviews you have heard before.

Now that I have introduced EPL, I’d like to take my identification with it

About reasons, and how we may or may not know about their logic or existence.

I always enjoy sitting next to the driver while going for long drives.(But love to drive someday)

Why am I telling you this? To let you know that I like being NOT in control, and leaving all the decisions and responsibility to someone else who is intelligent and capable. Makes me feel pampered and relaxed. Not having to worry about the brakes, traffic, accelerator, clutch, reversing and parking. Just look around at the people and trees zooming past, enjoying the breeze on my face, with my arm strung casually on the window ledge...

However, I’m just as quick to give up my passivity and assume control when required. Leadership roles beckon me, and I love them for granting me the opportunity to prove myself, protect and guide people, take risks and learn, garner praise and envy.

Well, backseat driving is horrible when I’m steering a vehicle, but impossible to give up when I’m sailing on anyone else’s ship. Change lanes, speed up, show off or get cranky – and you’ll hear from me, Mr. Driver.

WHY am I telling you this?

To tell you that I have control issues. Things have almost ALWAYS gone my way. I have made my own decisions, done my own thing and taken care of my own challenges. Be it education, career, relationships, or anything else. And that has naturally made me resistant to being dependent and dominated. In a woman, this is often not appreciated. But hey, that’s how I am. I don’t know about Nature (genetics), but Nurture (environment and experiences) made me that way.

And you know what, I am so glad life turned out the way it did. (Though I didn’t always think this way.)

Thank you, Lord.

Now I think about it all, and I can’t be grateful enough that all these things occurred, with or without my volition. Then, I fought with god, people and circumstances. But now I understand. Things are not always clear at first glance. Things don’t always look right when you’re in the midst of muck. But when you step out and think about it in retrospect, you will realize that things happened for the best.

(Unless you really messed up big time and made a mistake that’s irredeemable.)

Don’t get disoriented and distressed because of the blur. Give the haze time to fade. (But don’t wait so long that all ways to set things right are lost; time is of the essence, remember?)

So what if it’s a cliché? Its true - whatever happens, happens for the best.

And you may not always understand or agree with the reason, but hey… wait and watch, you’ll turn out fine.

Trust me.

Karma Konnection

It’s said that souls are born with human bodies after they commit a given number of good deeds. It’s supposed to be a blessing of the highest order to be born human. And more so, if you’re born in India. Didn’t know that, did you?


Additionally, some people know exactly what they will do/be, either at someone else’s behest or their own vision. So, I see folks who are sure they will be doctors or housewives and nothing else, and I see people who want to travel the world for as long as they live. And it’s lovely to have that knowledge. At least I find it exciting and inspiring.


But I know of other people who would rather discover their calling as they traipse their varied paths. They say knowing beforehand what one is born to do isn’t really motivating. Rather, they’d prefer to experiment and try different things before they freeze on a particular line to pursue as a career/purpose. To explore and identify for themselves their reason for being, as opposed to being born with the erudite information. Or having it thrust upon them, where they have no choice…


Even my schoolmates and peers who knew they wanted to be engineers and accordingly molded their careers in the most apt ways. B.E. then MS abroad followed by jobs and weddings. Life set.


While I was open to checking out the options and then making my selection. So, I thought about going in for Commerce .At least it’s my personal choice and I won’t regret it later. And if I do, I’ll blame nobody but myself.


So, which life is better? The one where you know, or the one where you don’t?


Is it better to meet your soul-mate right in school and stay together for life, or to meet a range of people from all walks of life and then choose your partner?


Is it preferable to work in your family business and go the secure way your ancestors trod, or to go from one company to the next, searching for the job where your heart, growth and interest lies?


Providence makes about 60% of the decision. The rest is upto you. And 40% isn’t peanuts.

I remember I’ve asked mum several times why we’re referred to as masters of our own actions when we really are just slaves to our destiny and past actions. How can we possibly claim that WE did something, wouldn’t it be more apt that LUCK made us do that thing? That it was pre-destined to be done that way? That the Almighty wrote our naseeb – every event and action in it, the moment we were born on this earth?


There are days when everything is just so right. We wake up in the morning feeling cheerful and relaxed for no reason, and we welcome the day with arms wide open. And as we live through the day, our spirits continue to soar high irrespective of the ups and downs we face. There are also days that are just the opposite. We wake up morose, and whatever happens throughout the day only serves to annoy us further and drag us deeper into the dumps. Who do we hold responsible for this? Who do we turn to, to change what is taking place?


Let me know if you know.


Cheers, and good luck with your ambitions!

Washroom chronicles

And this time, here’s a sneak peek into the woman’s private zone…

Are you excited yet?


Well, if you think what’s so great about a woman’s lavatory, think again.

(In fact, if you DO think that there’s nothing special about a woman’s restroom, it’s all the more reason for you to read this post. Brush up on your GK, dude!! Dobara mat poochna!!)


For women, a washroom is not merely a place to freshen up, but an essential part of living… If walls had ears, the restroom walls would have been a part of the Guinness World Records for holding the most secrets…


Women crying.

Women gossiping.

Women sniggering.

Women discussing latest fashion.

Women reminiscing about the good ol’ days.

Women experimenting with new looks and make up.


I haven’t mentioned half the list yet…

Now do you see?


Now, again you would think why I’m sharing all this with you non-members of this private and beautiful zone. Am I not a woman who loves this space? I do, which is why I’m showing you just how important and exciting this place is…

Why else would a woman excuse herself to go to the washroom the minute she steps into a home, restaurant, office or club?

Men don’t do that, do they? At least not the (comparatively) macho ones that I know…


So, women obviously sit on the pot as they chat with their friends and boyfriends, either bitching or whispering sweet nothings.

Or they could be wailing coz someone shouted on them for something that was frivolous (according to them). Maybe a boyfriend giving them grief. Or coz they were feeling unwell and some supervisor acted rude and insensitive. No dearth of reasons to cry – we’re women after all!


The powder room, as it is also called at times, is a must visit for any woman who enters a pub or workplace. (Or anywhere for that matter)

Staring at themselves for hours in the mirror. Curling their already curled (or straightened) hair. Lining their eyes with mascara for the tenth time in 10 minutes. Painting their already shining lips. Peering at marks (both visible and invisible, real and imaginary) on the face and elsewhere. Adjusting accessories or the dupatta or the t-shirt… And once all of this done, staring at themselves from top to bottom again – a quick check to see if everything’s in order.

Being a woman isn’t an easy job, fellas! It’s a lot of hard work…

And I bet you don’t mind when you see the great outcome that steps outta the washroom. Worth the wait, right?

The venue is also a breakout zone for a gang of giggly girls who want to catch up on lost time and updates. Like who’s dating whom, who fought with whom, what’s the masala in the work world and movie world.

I know this is taking it too far, but once I even saw a girl sipping coffee as she chatted up her pals in the washroom! Takes the cake, eh? LOL.


Well, well… Women who are taking offence, pardon me. But I honestly don’t understand the concept of wasting time in the loo. The loo is meant for a particular purpose, one that I often finish in less than a minute. And when I see chics spending a good 15 minute break at work in the loo… It kinda surprises and amuses me.

And we laugh on…

I've got Lal Bal, Pal !

Breaking News!!

I streaked my hair... Had them streaked at a parlour I mean... (It's also called highlighting, for those who don't know.) Which means I now have strands of red hair (not the fire-van red, it's a maroonish kinda tinge,similar to this picture ) on my crown . It ain't done as abundantly as I'd planned, but no sweat - I'm happy! :-)

Waise I am a very simple girl... And I feel all the more frugal when I see women around me dressing up for college everyday. (How will lining and kohl-ing your eyes and painting your lips help you be efficient and effective ) Of course, I tend to go overboard with my minimalism; even for parties, all I do is apply some earthy kajal and I'm all set, even as my gal-buddies blow-dry and iron their hair, paint their barn with foundation and rouge, color their eyes in dazzling blues and pinks, and outline their glossy lips. Whew! Each to their own; I inherited my no-nonsense-no-makeup attitude from my mum. But well, she is an angel to look at, whereas I could do with some help...

Anywaysssssssss...

While the hairdresser was Loreal-ing my tresses, I glanced through the numerous issues of Femina, Filmfare and other mags stacked on the counter. I read Sallu's cool-dude comments on his paintings and his hostility towards Shahrukh, I checked out fashion scares Mithun-da and Sonam Kapoor, and I read gossip about Hrithik and Barbara (Kites), Shahid and Amrita Rao (I thought she was going to get married and happily quit acting), etc.

I set hands on a Woman's Era magazine (November issue, I think), and staring at me out of the front cover were the words - HOW TO GET YOUR MAN TO TALK (or something to that effect.)

For ages I have been pondering over this very subject - why men gel so well and chat for hours with their buddies and colleagues and neighbors and roomies, but recoil every time their wife/girlfriend asks them to "talk" to her.

So, this article seemed God-sent, and I glanced through the words I've murmured a million times : Why men consider monosyllabic replies and grunts as perfect conjugal conversations, why they find nothing wrong in reading the newspaper as their disgruntled lady makes their chai / coffee in the kitchen, why a women's expression of her feelings or need to resolve relationship problems bores and irritates and annoys them, and so on and so forth.


Of course, the article did not answer these queries in anything more than a gender differences way; the usual "genders are wired differently" solution. However, reading the statements there assured me that I am not the only one who broods over these topics. The writer went on to relate how you can get a man to talk... And these ways are : just sit with him quietly (ahem!) and observe/understand as he goes about his tasks and activities, ask him about cars/bikes/politics/sports/gadgets or anything else that he's passionate about, avoid talking about his family, and the sort.


Nothing akin to rocket science, and all quite do-able, but my question is HOW LONG? You can do something a few times, and it's not unnatural to expect that the other person will also go a little out of the way to ease things... Taali ek haath se nahi bajti dost! You can rave on and on about gender differences and not head anywhere, and you can both understand and try to make things wonderful... Not impossible, right?!!

Anywayssss..My sister was looking like a Star on her wedding, everything went well . Most people from my school, college and family circle was happy with the Preparations they gave the Newly- Wed couple there blessings .
Good for them. Not good for me coz I hate these family dos. Compound it with the fact that there are horny old men lurking about and trying to grab a handful of you as they stare at your boobs and talk about stupid things. Grrr... It's all I can do to stop myself from slapping them... And then when some woman comes and starts inquiring about your profession as if she is planning to propose a billion-dollar business deal...

Time out.

Happy weekend!

10 Things

Just been thinking about this...

Here are 10 things I would say to my girl, if I was a guy...

1. Look at her in a dreamy-eyed way and say, "You're gooooorgeous, woman! I can't take my eyes off you..."

2. "I'll always be there for you honey."

3. "Sweetheart, you have made me the luckiest man on this planet by loving me."

4. "I care for you baby."

5. "I feel incomplete without you... Can I hug you forever?"

6. "Man! I'd be damned if you weren't by my side."

7. When she's smiling/laughing, "I love to see you happy."

8. "Your wish is my command, princess."

9. "I'm dying to see you, my angel."

10. "I missssss you :-( "

... And more importantly, 10 things I would NEVER ever say...

1. "What have you ever done for me?"

2. "Why don't you make some coffee as I read the newspaper in the other room?"

3. "Can we talk later? I want to watch the football/cricket match."

4. "The gang's going out so I won't be able to come for your convocation/party."

5. "You ruined my life. I wish we'd never met!"

6. "His girlfriend is a babe! Love the way she dances/dresses/talks."

7. "You were with me just for my money."

8. "Couldn't you wear something better?" OR "You look funny/horrible/OK."

9. "You don't satisfy me."

10. "Call me after you stop crying" OR "Meet me after your problems are sorted out."

You're welcome :-)

I am me .

As I watch the waves I think,
About the person I am,
So what if I feel a particular way?
Am I to hold it back like a dam?

The sandy beach reminds me,
Life isn't always the same;
Some of the sand jumps for the tide,
And some remains stable and tame.

So what if I get upset over things that appear trivial?
For me, nothing's a silly game...

The sun sets low on the horizon,
Conveying, relax, it all ends one day;
Why then with any realization,
Do the tears come and my composure sway?

I have my goods and bads,
I'm generous, assertive and guileless;
I am what I am,
And whoever said one has to be flawless?

I get attached to people the very first time I meet them,
So what?

I keep smiling with or without reason,
So what?

I'm possessive and rude when provoked,
So what?

I feel betrayed and hurt when those that I love,
Adore something else more than me;
Their passion, ego or a plaything,
Even their family.

I do unreasonable, absurd things,
Like wanting those that don't want me.

I'm responsible and protective,
And I hate the fact that I'm so sensitive...

They call me stubborn and self-centred,
Though they know of my jolly, sweet nature,
Doesn't bother me... Whoever wants to please them all...
Not me for sure!

Or do I??

What matters finally
Is that I know I'm wonderful,
I know my weaknesses,
And that's my greatest strength...

I am me...

Always

You are my mom, sister, enemy, 
and will always be a friend. 
You will always be the only one never forgotten. 
Through thick and thin, 
we were always together even if we didn’t always want to be. 

You showed me the most compassion when less expected. 
I love you and went to you when I knew I shouldn’t have, 
and then I suffered the consequences, 
but so did you.

You've always been there,
making sure I was o.k.
The one that helped me be,
the kind of person I am today.
I'll never be able to repay you,
for all that you have done for me.
Knowing that I'd need someone,
when I'd fall and scrape my knee.


You are my big sister,
one that I admire most.
I will always be thankful,
having a sister like you makes me boast.
Not to mention those times,
when boys were boys.
And you were always the first one,
to help me regain my poise.
You were my mom, sister, enemy, 
and will always be a friend 
because blood will always be thicker than water. 
You are my blood, part of me, 
and I love you for that.


Now you're getting married,
and your life will soon be complete.
But I will always come to you,
whenever I feel defeat.

So this is my attempt,
at thanking you for what you've done.

my sister :)
 

To My Marshmallow

How do I feel when I am with you?

Lovely.

Complete.

Protected.

Special.

Content.

What do you do to make me feel this way?

At times, something.

Most of the times, nothing at all.

I just feel that way coz I love you and I can sense your love if not directly experience it at a given moment.

I just put my head on your shoulder and I forget all the worries and sorrows in the world.

Cuddled in your arms, I hear your heart beating against my palm, and time comes to a standstill.

I can’t stop smiling as I look at you coz I’m struck by the fact that I love you like crazy.

And I think of the way you look at me, and I know you love me too…

Isn’t it beautiful, this thing that we have?

So what if we fight? So what if there are times when we can’t bear each other? So what if we’ve often contemplated going our separate ways?

We’re still together… Still going strong…

You have the power to make me feel like the most beautiful woman on the planet, and you can also make me feel stupid and helpless. I effortlessly label you a complete jerk, and my trust in you can help you move mountains.

If not love, what is it?

We’re both learning. We’re both growing. As individuals and a couple. And there’s tons more to come. A zillion more experiences in the wings, waiting for us to embrace them and come out stronger.

Closer.

Inseparable.

The simplest of things that I do with you become my most cherished moments.

The way you tease me and I poke fun at your mannerisms and habits. The funny things we say to each other in fights and tricky situations… It’s all so adorable.

Unforgettable.

I love you.

Will it last?

I think so.

Relations die. Love never does.

So what if you irritate me by acting silly? So what if I stress you by asking for more than you think you can do? So what if we want to pull out each others’ hair for crazy reasons?

We’re still together…

And I know we can live through this.

Isn’t that what love is all about?

True, things won’t be exciting all the time. There will be times when we think we’re better off alone.

But are we?

Am I?

Not when I think of the beautiful memories you’ve given me.

Are you?

(You’re definitely not, if you ask me. You’d wreck your life if you were allowed to do your own thing.)

I can visualize our perfect life together. Where you don’t feel lonely, and I don’t feel detached and forgotten. Where we both know that we’re meant to be. Happy and faithful. Together. Till death do us apart.

It won’t be easy. Nobody said it would be.

But together we’ll do just fine.

Trust me.

(And mend your ways before I flog you!)

Love.

Snob-itis

A new disease that deserves a mention in the medical and personality nomenclature...


Hitting the youth with increased vigor.


The deadly, the ugly... SNOB-ITIS.


I hate snobs. What do they think of themselves? That they’re one in a million? Of course they are. Just like everybody else… Or one in 1.15 billion, to be more precise (that’s 1,150,000,000… fantastic, eh?)

People throw attitude as if they were born monarchs and happen to be here just because of some cruel joke that destiny played on them. Crazy folks strutting around glancing at others out of the corner of their eyes with a silly, insulting smirk on their ugly lips… What’s to be gained by looking down on everybody around?

I seriously don’t understand. I myself am pretty outgoing (though I don’t talk half as much as most people I know) and I make sure I talk to anybody and everybody, regardless of age, gender, caste or whatever. I think it my duty to be nice to new joinees or those who are uncomfortable in a new situation. Snooty people think it lowly when they approach someone and so they stay aloof, projecting an ice-queen/king image, waiting for others to get friendly. And then there are some who dislike it even when someone makes an attempt to strike a conversation. As long as one’s safety and dignity is not jeopardized, what’s the harm in being courteous??? Height of haughtiness.


Maybe it’s the upbringing. Maybe the personality. The ancient nature-nurture controversy. Whatever, I really hate it...

In fact, I’ve often felt that belonging to a group of guys is a wonderful thing. Most males are cool, unbothered and affable. They invite and adjust with anybody, and one can become a part of the group without doing/proving too much. Women crib a lot about being “similar” and having “matching wavelengths”. And I say it’s irritating. Yes, I do show attitude at times, when I really don’t want someone to approach me, but I ensure that I openly state my feelings most of the times. I hate dragging things and creating issues. My being upfront occasionally lands me in a soup, but I don’t regret it. I’d rather not let things cook in my and others’ minds.

Back to gender benders. Guys DO gossip (no use your squealing and vehemently denying this), but it’s the sharing-fun-incidents kinds, not the who’s-dating-whom so typical of girls. And no “Aah”, “Ooohh” and “Omigosh” that women frequently use with reference to make-up, dressing trends, and this-freaky-guy-asked-me-out-the-other-day stories. With men, it’s easy and effortless. They laugh, they chill out. No wonder most of my good friends are guys. Of course, their maturity and sensitivity level isn’t exactly as splendid as females, but no one’s perfect!

Check out this quote I found in the midst of my silly googling sessions…
“…I like snobs. A snob has to spend so much time being a snob that he has little time left to meddle with you” – William Faulkner
“The true snob never rests; there is always a higher goal to attain, and there are, by the same token, always more and more people to look down upon” - J. Russell Lynes

Catch ya later!